Baked
Alaska
Part 6: Icy waters
They showed
"Titanic" on the ship that night. Being an idiot,
I went to see it, despite the icebergs floating by outside
the porthole. I cried during the final hour, when it's obvious
the boat is going down, but no one in the movie knows it.
While the band played, I calculated if I could swim to shore
in icy waters. I also thought about spending the night in
a lifeboat.
I was in my
cabin the next day, packing and watching CNN, when Ken Starr's
Clinton impeachment report was announced to great fanfare
in Washington. I headed for dinner, dreading the inevitable
political commentary. Course by course I ordered and waited:
Caesar salad, crab legs, baked Alaska. They're really into
flambée. They love crepe Suzette, anything they can
set on fire, even ice cream. Cruise passengers are such
avid spectators. They love ice carving and champagne-glass
pyramids too.
"You
won't believe what I saw on TV today," Thomas said
as the desserts arrived.
Shit, I thought, bracing myself. Here it comes.
"'Baywatch'!"
he exclaimed. "The episode in Glacier Bay. David Hasselhoff
stood on the balcony right outside my cabin!"
"David
Hasselhoff!"
I breathed
a huge sigh of relief: I was going home.
